“False! Obvoiusly, false,” will be the all-to-quick answer. Suppose I say, “Nope. No quick answers. Read that title again and think before you speak.” After such a pause the answer will bear nuance sounding more like, “Well, the answer is false, but…” Why the caveat?
Those three words: God is stingy kick up a mental tension, a squint in the psyche. The answer is supposed to be a loudish “False!” but as we recollect our life, other’s lives it is not terribly difficult to find moments of genuine need, moments where God seemed to hold back. Stingy? “Well, no, but…” Perhaps you can find people like the disciple Thomas who feel a bit burned by prior beliefs, hopes, trusts. So, scattered among us are tensions, in ourselves, our families, our communities.
Let me pose a less blatant question. If you pray for something and it doesn’t get the “yes” or the “yes” seems very delayed what happens to your thoughts? Your feelings? The way you behave in the future? Are you all excited to rush off and pray for the next thing? Does the needle on your trust-o-meter shift even a little toward a God is stingy stance? Do you lose some, maybe even a tiny bit, of your drive to ask God when you are next in need? Do you know anyone who has experienced the “No” from God and said, “Whatever, I’m outta here.”
Jesus the people watcher
Jesus was a people watcher par excellence. Jesus observed the hard thoughts people have of God when their prayers seem to come back empty. More importantly, by studying passages such as the one coming up we can see Jesus in a particularly kind light. We can see that he does not slap judgement on us for having automatic hard thoughts, instincts. Instead he offers words that can act as a rescue from them, to help with the caveats. It could even be said that the Christmas story of Immanuel, God-with-us is less about staying out of hell and more about coping skills for life’s bites.
Now let’s look at a non-Christmas passage that paints along these lines. Here some 30+ years after the Advent he is living, teaching, showing coping skills. In this example he appends parables to what we call the Lord’s Prayer. These can be handholds for our human foibles.
5 Then he said to them, “Suppose one of you has a friend, and he goes to him at midnight and says, ‘Friend, lend me three loaves of bread, 6 because a friend of mine on a journey has come to me, and I have nothing to set before him.’
(Luke 11 – NIV1984- Bible Portal)
7 “Then the one inside answers, ‘Don’t bother me. The door is already locked, and my children are with me in bed. I can’t get up and give you anything.’ 8 I tell you, though he will not get up and give him the bread because he is his friend, yet because of the man’s boldness he will get up and give him as much as he needs.
For most of my life I have imagined the fellow in bed (verse 7) as one who was usually generous. It has been my sense that his lack of hospitality the night his neighbor came a knocking was a once-off thing, a friendliness-slip up. What if this man’s stinginess was his normal? What if the local community knew this fellow to be a ‘don’t bother me’ type?
In that case the knocking of the needy neighbor takes on a different hue. We see him going across the street with less confidence. In the face of such uncertainty he has to be volitional, bold; he must march right over and let his needs be known. Then he has to keep letting his needs be known and “because of the man’s boldness, his persistence” he will get the loaves for his friend. He is persistent in the face of uncertainty for the needs of his unexpected guest.
Stories to understand by
Recognize this story for the play that it is. Notice how Jesus casts God in this drama. Are you startled to see God given such inhospitable character traits? Is this because God really is stingy? Of course, not. Jesus, though, is willing to cast God the Father as people imagine him. In teaching on prayer there is that formula he just gave, but despite the formula there is the crustiness, the suspiciousness of humanity that will powerfully interpose itself in the realm of people and their prayers.
Praying is a personal thing. It is a communication between God and us that has many moments of a one-way-conversation. At those times God seems crazy distant, indifferent, inhospitable. Jesus is coaching his disciples that even when they imagine God in an ill-light they should be persistent, keep banging on heaven’s gates. Keep the formula “Your will be done not mine,” but don’t quit. When you keep at it like this pressing on despite inklings of God’s stinginess you will at some point arrive at peace. The shape of the peace will be how God through the Holy Spirit desires to change and mold you. You may get what you asked for, or you may get insight into why you aren’t getting it. Or you may face continued silence. When God gets you to a point where the lesson he is forming in you can be received then you will have your “Aha!”. Then felicity, that inner happiness despite outer circumstances, can land in your heart and mind, your psyche.
For further insight look into the second parable of this Lesson on Prayer. It includes snakes and stones and bread and such. Its gist: God’s benevolence is genuine. He sees the things you are convinced of wrongly or not. Looking over them and through them and under them he sees all the way down to the best places. Be bold and knock on heaven’s gates even if your are suspicious. Then trust his benevolence and wait on his answer. That is the gist of Christ’s lesson to the disciples.
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